A Love Letter to People Who Want Refunds for Work They Didn't Do
Because apparently reading is the same as implementing
Dear Person Who Wants Their $25 Back,
I see you've downloaded my guide, skimmed three pages, decided it's "complete shit," and now want a refund because you're not magically transformed. Let's unpack this together, shall we?
The Life Cycle of a $25 Investment:
Find guide
Declare $25 is "too expensive"
Buy it anyway
Skim it while watching Netflix
Do none of the work
Demand refund
Leave angry review about how "it doesn't work"
Achievement Unlocked: Professional Product Tester! 🏆
Things That Cost About $25:
One mediocre takeout meal
Half a tank of gas
5 fancy coffees
This guide that could change your life (if you actually did the work)
But you're right - the guide that took weeks to create and years of experience to develop should definitely be free. My bad.
The "It Doesn't Work" Translation Guide:
When you say: "It doesn't work!" You mean: "I didn't work."
When you say: "This is useless!" You mean: "I didn't use it."
When you say: "It's not what I expected!" You mean: "I expected transformation without effort."
When you say: "I want my money back!" You mean: "I want a refund on my lack of commitment."
A Breakdown of Your $25 Investment:
What you paid for:
Years of experience
Proven processes
Step-by-step guidance
Transformative potential
What you used:
3 minutes of skimming
0 minutes of implementation
12 minutes writing angry emails
And somehow this is the guide's fault? 🤔
The Math of "This Doesn't Work":
Cost of guide: $25 Time spent complaining: 2 hours Value of time spent complaining: $50+ Money saved by actually doing the work: Priceless
But sure, let's focus on getting that $25 back.
A Timeline of Implementation:
What you did:
Downloaded guide
Looked at table of contents
Decided it was too much work
Demanded refund
What you didn't do:
The actual work
Any of the exercises
Follow the process
Give it more than 5 minutes
Trust the journey
Special Recognition Awards:
🏆 Best Performance in "Scanning Without Reading" 🏆 Excellence in Premature Judgment 🏆 Outstanding Achievement in Refund Requests 🏆 Lifetime Achievement in Not Doing the Work
To Everyone Who's Ever Said "It Doesn't Work":
Question: Did you?
Read it? (All of it?)
Try it? (Actually try it?)
Give it time? (More than 5 minutes?)
Do the work? (Any of it?)
No?
Then maybe, just maybe, the problem isn't the $25 guide.
A Gentle Reminder:
Digital products are like gym memberships:
Buying them doesn't make you fit
Having them doesn't equal using them
Reading about exercise isn't the same as doing it
The transformation happens in the implementation
The Real Truth:
The guide isn't magic. It's a tool. Like any tool:
It only works if you use it
It takes practice
Results require action
Transformation takes time
For Future Reference:
If you're looking for:
Instant transformation
Magic solutions
Results without effort
Success without work
I hear there's lots of free advice on Google!
In Conclusion:
Yes, I'll process your refund. No, I won't refund your lack of effort. Yes, there's a difference.
P.S. The guide still works, even if you didn't.
P.P.S. Your refund request took more energy than actually doing the work would have.
P.P.P.S. Crafted with my AI thinking partner because sometimes you need to process the irony of people wanting refunds for work they didn't do - and if you're ready to actually do the work (wild concept, I know), grab the Permission to Process Guide. Just don't expect it to work by osmosis. 😉