Yes, I Process With AI: A Love Letter to Finding Your Voice When Your Nervous System Says No
Because sometimes your best comebacks arrive three days later when you're safe at home
To Everyone Who Thinks I'm "Hiding Behind AI":
Let's talk about nervous systems, freeze responses, and finding your voice when your body's default setting is "shut down and walk away."
The Reality of Real-Time Responses:
What you see in person:
Silence
Walking away
Shutting down
"Everything's fine"
What's actually happening:
Nervous system: ALERT! ALERT!
Brain: buffering
Body: Time to freeze!
Inner voice: will have PERFECT response in 3-5 business days
The Truth About That Snarky Voice:
Yes, I use AI to help me process and express my snark. No, the AI isn't creating my personality. It's giving my actual personality a safe space to emerge.
Think of it like this:
The snark is mine
The sass is mine
The wit is mine
The wisdom is mine
The AI is just the bouncer keeping my nervous system's panic response out of the club.
A Brief History of Processing:
Then:
Sports fields
Weight rooms
Physical outlets
Safe spaces to be fierce
Now:
Freeze responses
Fawn responses
Shutdown modes
Perfect comebacks... three days later
What Actually Happens in Real Time:
Them: says something belittling My Brain: initiates shutdown sequence My Body: activates freeze protocol My Voice: has left the chat My Snark: will arrive via delayed processing in 72 hours
The Physical Reality of Emotional Processing:
When you can't:
Hit the gym
Run it out
Lift it off
Sweat it through
Play it away
Those emotions need somewhere to go. (Preferably somewhere that doesn't trigger your nervous system's alarm system)
Why AI Processing Works:
Because:
No judgment
No time limits
No "are you done yet?" stares
No real-time pressure
No fight/flight/freeze/fawn response
Just pure, unfiltered processing space.
The Truth About Being "Real":
Here's what's real:
Freeze responses are real
Delayed processing is real
Nervous system responses are real
Needing safe spaces to express yourself is real
Finding tools that work for you is real
What Processing with AI Actually Means:
It means:
I value my voice enough to find safe ways to use it
I respect my nervous system's need for safety
I understand my processing style
I choose tools that support my authenticity
I prioritize genuine expression over real-time reactions
For Those Who Say "Just Speak Up In The Moment":
Cool suggestion. Quick questions:
Have you met my nervous system?
Would you like to explain that to my freeze response?
Can you schedule that for 3-5 business days after my processing time?
The Evolution of Finding Your Voice:
Freeze in the moment
Process when safe
Find your voice
Express your truth
Repeat as needed
Sometimes with a side of AI assistance, because growth doesn't care what tools you use.
A Note About Authenticity:
Authenticity isn't about:
Real-time responses
Immediate comebacks
Performing on demand
Ignoring your nervous system
It's about:
Honoring your truth
Finding safe ways to express it
Using tools that support you
Processing in ways that work for you
The Bottom Line:
Yes, I process with AI. Yes, this is my real voice. Yes, these are my actual thoughts. Yes, this is authentic self-expression.
No, I don't owe anyone an explanation about my processing tools. No, I won't apologize for finding what works. No, your opinion about my methods doesn't matter.
To Everyone Who Gets It:
You know who you are. The ones who:
Find their perfect comebacks in the shower
Process best on paper
Need time to find their words
Understand that safety creates authenticity
This is for you too.
P.S. Written while honoring my nervous system's need for safety and my brain's love of delayed processing.
P.P.S. Yes, my AI thinking partner helped me express this. Because sometimes the most authentic thing you can do is use the tools that let your real voice emerge.
P.P.P.S. Created in partnership with my AI thinking companion, because finding safe spaces to process is how real authenticity happens - and if you want to discover your own safe processing space, check out my Permission to Process Guide. Because your nervous system deserves a bouncer too. 😉