Business Advice from People Who Quit Before the Website Went Live
"It's all a scam!" - Person who tried for exactly 3.5 business days
To the "I Tried That Once" Experts:
"It doesn't work!" - Said after sending exactly 2 DMs and getting no response
"The market is saturated!" - Translation: "I posted once and didn't go viral"
"Nobody makes money in this!" - Person who never made it past the 'setting up Gmail' phase
"The tech is too complicated!" - But have you tried... learning it?
"It's impossible to succeed!" - Based on my extensive research of quitting before month 1
Signs You're Hearing from a Professional Almost-Entrepreneur:
"I bought the domain but..."
"I was going to launch but..."
"I almost finished the course but..."
"I started setting up but..."
"I was THIS close to..."
Honey, buying a domain name doesn't make you a business expert. It makes you the owner of $12 worth of good intentions.
The "Almost Made It" Hall of Fame:
Almost finished the website
Almost sent the first email
Almost posted consistently
Almost learned the tech
Almost did the work
But definitely completed the "declaring it's all a scam" phase! 🏆
To Those Who "Gave It Their All":
You mean you gave it your all... for a whole weekend?
"I tried everything!" - Everything except patience, apparently
"Nothing worked!" - After trying exactly one thing, one time
"The course was a scam!" - Because it didn't download business skills directly into your brain?
"It's too hard!" - Unlike complaining, which you've clearly mastered
Real Talk About Your "Failed Business":
You didn't fail at business. You succeeded at:
Giving up early
Avoiding discomfort
Collecting excuses
Professional complaining
Speed-running to victimhood
The "I Tried It" Translation Guide:
When they say: "I tried starting a business..." They mean: "I thought about it really hard"
When they say: "I gave it everything..." They mean: "I worked on it during one motivational weekend"
When they say: "The market is saturated..." They mean: "Someone else was already doing it"
When they say: "The tech was impossible..." They mean: "I refused to watch the tutorial"
Congratulations! You've Earned:
🏆 Fastest Time to Declaring Something a Scam 🏆 Most Creative Excuses for Not Actually Starting 🏆 Excellence in Premature Rage Quitting 🏆 Distinguished Service in Almost Doing Something 🏆 Lifetime Achievement in "About to Start"
Pro Tips from the Almost-Made-It Club:
Definitely quit before revenue
Give up at the first obstacle
Declare it impossible before trying
Call everything a scam immediately
Master the art of almost starting
The Only Thing You Actually Finished:
Your journey from "this is my year!" to "it's all a scam!" in record time.
But hey, keep ignoring this advice. I love watching people declare themselves business experts after their 72-hour career as an entrepreneur.
P.S. Looking forward to your TED Talk: "Why Everything is a Scam: Insights from My Weekend as an Entrepreneur"
P.P.S. The graveyard of abandoned Shopify stores salutes you. 😉
P.P.P.S. Created in partnership with my AI thinking companion, because processing complex thoughts shouldn't come with a per-minute charge or timezone restrictions. Ready for your own processing breakthrough? The Permission to Process Guide awaits.